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Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Comments on teen behaviour

My son tells me there is a gang called "Pop Bottles" that regularly beats people up. It may help a parent who has heard this name mentioned in their house.
In my opinion alcohol, drugs and free time are just too accessible in Zimbabwe for our youngsters. Once you realise that your child is an alcoholic, drug addict or both it is too late. There are no rehabilitation establishments here in Zimbabwe. The rehab centres in South Africa are expensive and then you still have to get them there. Easy solution be an example to your children and please do not encourage them to drink alcohol even if it is 'only' a glass of wine - cigarettes are also a drug just not classed as a narcotic. Please sign me as 'speaking from experience' .
It seems that parents need to be trained how to be parents! What has happened to all the discipline orientated activities like Scouts, cadets etc. The youngsters will learn from their friends while Dad and Mom defend them. I heard of an incident that took place recently where the Father got beaten up by his own son!! What has gone wrong??
i agree with the teacher. seriously we should know where our kids are at that time of the night and yes teachers/schools cant looking out for students during school holidays and weekends
School kids should not be allowed out to night clubs... Full stop. And quite frankly there should also be a law that night clubs are prohibited from allowing school kids entry... in other words NO UNDER 18 ... which also happens to be the age kids are by law NOT TO BE SERVED ALCOHOL! Night clubs found guilty should be given a very hefty fine AND enforced with closure for set periods i.e. weeks or months depending on the number of times they are found breaking the same law. On the home front, parents who allow their children to do as they please, including the night club issue, buying expensive cars and allowing ease of access to alcohol and the like at home, are merely seeking excuses for shirking their responsibility as parents, when they should in fact be spending more time with them at home, on outings, on the sports field or simply with other family and friends. Otherwise why the hell did they have children in the first place...
We are in a society that is fast becoming an uncultured society. We spoke the other day about litter bins in the car - the same goes for many facets from our society that fraying right before our eyes. Discipline starts in the home, but once children are exposed to the outside world, it is the influence of that too that has an impact. Someone said that the school has a responsibility towards dealing with this... I fully concur - and furthermore, state that it is a collective effort to combat but with assertiveness and in synchronisation... meaning - parents of perpetrators and victims, schools, churches and the society on the whole. The parents, like the schools, should have a "No Bullying" policy and the repercussions should be fearful enough to deter any perpetrator from attempting to do so. In addition to this, should there be a perpetrator who continues with this damaging behaviour, the parents of the child should be brought into any rehabilitation programmes that the school might have chosen in order for the parents to become more involved/aware of their child(ren's) behavioural concern. From the society at large, more advocacy needs to be done in order for people to become more aware of this. Alas, most people may not take heed because if it is not happening to them, it is does not affect them. However, it is worth a try.
I find the attitude of teens/young adults today DISGUSTING. I am only 22 and am horrified at these stories and at the behavior of these brats. After a long week's hard work we should be able to go out to our favourite watering hole, unwind, and have a beer. And instead we arrive at 8pm to find drunk underage kids everywhere causing trouble as well as getting themselves into trouble. Being told we are "too old" to be out at night by underage kids (who are already slurring and stumbling around) happens all too often. I believe an attitude adjustment is the first step to fixing this issue. The sooner these guys realize this behaviour is not looked at as 'COOL' and will not be tolerated - the better. This may just be my opinion but they need to feel as humiliated as they make other people feel. If we catch any of these guys, their parents must deal with them in public and in front of their friends - this may get the message out that this will not be accepted.
My daughter went to an all girls school and was bullied for more than a year before we discovered. The headmistress and deputy said as there was no physical proof and that there was nothing they could do about it. The headmistress removed her from the school on condition she received psychological evaluation and then they would decide if she was fit to return to school. The gang of girls were never dealt with and the problem only got worse and so we decided to send her to home school (this was during her O level year). I have reported this to the Ministry of education and it has been almost two years and we have not received a response. I doubt if there was ever an investigation done. Bullying is a serious matter and it is sad to see that our school heads "sweep it under the carpet". My daughter has since received counselling and has slowly regained confidence.
Bored, spoilt, undisciplined brats !!!!  Yes, we speak of past generations who would say, they need to have done basic military training like we had to do, etc. etc. BUT, I blame the parents to begin with, not being interested enough to bring these “things” up correctly in the first place, no discipline & most importantly, no parenting!!!  The parents are probably too involved in being with “their generation”, taken over daddy’s bucks/business & don’t want to be seen by the others, as being a parent (strict) and would rather be a “hip” parent.

However, what happens when there is a fatal assault ??  Do the parents even begin to think of what happens, God forbid, little noo-noo goes to prison & within hours, is someone’s “whore”, then what???  This is the reality of life, particularly in our prisons, and the world over.

Yes, have seen too many of these spoilt little brats fired up on booze & drugs who think it is great fun attacking someone, and all funded by their equally responsible parents. NAME & SHAME, definitely for starters and, I think that perhaps our ZRP can lay in wait at all the “hot spots” , they know where they are, and grab these “heroes”.
Would love to see their reaction then!!!!
Ex non practicing Christian - What I am suggesting is that these kids need rehabilitation.  They need therapy.  Years and years of abusive conditioning needs to be undone.  Fighting 'fire with fire' has never turned out that great.  I do not under any circumstances condone what those boys have done, but neither do I condone the frankly downright violent responses to their actions.  Violence will never solve violence.  I deplore alcohol, and feel that it should be outlawed, but that's not going to happen.  These kids need rehabilitation.  Not more violence.  How on earth can anyone with any common sense think that vengeful retaliations are going to accomplish any worthwhile lesson.  People should be encouraged to do right because it's right, not because they're afraid of doing wrong.  Fear ultimately, sooner or later, turns to rebellion and that is exactly what we are witnessing in this community today.  These kids have been raised with fear, they are immune to it now. People who are hurt, hurt other people.  The answer is not more hurt
I think that the geoff who wrote in about getting beaten by a youngster should come clean and tell the real story.. the Tin Roof has it on camera that the youngster didn’t start the incident. No-one condones what happened.. but you need to get facts from both sides. Im a so called ballie, but i wouldn’t go after someone unless they deserved it. BEFORE YOU PUT SOMETING ON HERE,REMEMBER IT PAYS TO TELL THE TRUTH.
I couldn`t agree more with "Ex-non practicing Christian ", these thugs need to be given a dose of their own medicine and taken down a dark alley one night and given a good hiding by a gang, just the same as they did, they wouldn`t bully again!!! Signed "Don`t spare the rod"
The problem appears to be rampant in Independent Schools…. Catholic Schools both self-funding and Mission Based have an active Child Protection Policy that has zero tolerance on any form of child abuse, to include Corporal Punishment and Bullying ( which are Internationally Classified forms of Child Rights Abuses)

Child Protection policy in an Education system ensures that Children are safe from all forms of abuse by anyone children and adults alike, by teaching the children their rights and their responsibilities towards these rights. This is one form of assertiveness training for children so they may develop skills and abilities to protect themselves from abuse. It is generally schools that can impart such skills on children by entrenching Child Protection Practice in the way they educate.

We all can do this  through honest reforms on the way we educate and the way we run our schools. I am afraid Bullying, Substance Abuse and Child Exploitation are often an indication of  a possible crisis in a school or education system  – perhaps our schools are now  outdated conservative institutions that fail to respond to the present demands of the 21st Century? My suggestion to remedy this and several other child safety problems riddling especially our Independent Education system  is to honestly  and meaningfully  addressing issues of Child Protection in our schools by developing active mechanisms that protect children from any form of Abuse ( to  include Bullying, Substance Abuse, Sexual Abuse, Child Exploitation, Corporal Punishment etc).
Editors Disclaimer: Please note that this is a selection of comments taken from recent emails sent into me by various bambazonke nhasi readers. I send them out to try and stimulate discussion on issues that I feel are topical in our current environment. Please try to be sensible with your comments and offer useful advice without bringing any person(s) or company into disrepute. I do not necessarily agree or disagree with each comment and cannot check the veracity of each email. Regards Mike G

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